The airlines in India seems to have forgotten some simple money making formulae in their avariciousness. They need not have increased the fares and welcomed the wrath of the government and the flying public. It could have been done so subtly that no one will notice it. Already they themselves are doing it. When they advertise in the papers that a flight from Bangalore to Delhi will cost only one rupee some idiot like me think that it is what I have to pay. But only when you buy the ticket one knows that fuel charges taxes etc are extra. Nobody bothers about the fine print.
Like that first of all 'Loo Charges'. This not my own idea. I seem to have read of this some time back that some American airlines are thinking about it. ( There is an interesting story which came in Times of India an year or so back which I shall tell later. Now this is 'ways and means to increase the revenue' of airlines.) Either one cabin crew can be placed at the entrance to the loos on board to collect the charges or put coin-slot locks on the door. The timing should be so adjusted that after a time say ten seconds the door locks and the person can come only after he pays for the whole period he spends there. More or less in the same way as a public telephones. At present I am not finding a way to make every passenger to drink a litre or two of aqua before he or she boards the plane. This should fetch a good income for the airlines.
Another hidden charge will be for the seat. If anyone wants to sit charge for it. Simply argue that charge is for taking the passenger from place A to place B. Sitting is luxury and for that one should pay extra. As for the charges for the seat sky is the limit. After all the difference in fare for the Economy Class and First Class is the question of leg space comfort and such. So there is nothing wrong in having seperate payment for the seat.
Another is the Pressurising Charges. The cabins are pressurised. Like fuel charges that can also be charged. Those who do not want to travel pressurised should have an option to travel in the hold as human cargoes.
And like that there can be many other charges. Say Embarkation Charges, Dis-Embarkation Charges and so may. I leave it to the individual airlines.
As told this news item came in TOI or NYT some time back.
It was a flight from South America to US. From which country I don't remember. One connoisseur of food whose interest in food bordered that of a glutton was travelling on that flight from South America. He had a heavy lunch in the city. The flight was in the evening. When he took the boarding pass he found that there was sufficient time for some snacks and went to the coffee shop. Though his intention was to have some light snack, what to say one snack led to another and that one another and so on. By the time he left the place the last call for boarding was being called. He hurried and got in before they could close the door of the plane. He comfortable sat on his seat on the Economy Class. He could see the loo indicator light just ahead and the First Class cabin beyond that. He searched the pouch in front and lifted the safety instructions and felt bored and pushed it back. The next reading material he selected was the airline magazine and none of the multitude of advertisement interested him. He thought of this and of that and slowly dozed.
After some time was passed he felt some uneasiness in his stomach. He loosened the seat belt but that did not solve. He squirmed in his seat thinking that that will help and in that process poked his elbow on the ribs of the passenger sitting on his side and got a grunt and nasty look for his efforts. That look and grunt did not help to reduce the uneasiness in the stomach and he squirmed the other way only to poke this time a passing cabin crew and was rewarded with a nastier look.
Things were going bad and from bad to worse. He looked forward towards the loo sign and to his chagrin it was read. He looked back to see whether the loo there was unoccupied. He cursed and sat. After a couple of minutes he looked to see whether there are any welcome signs either from the front or from back. Both were still red. Whoever had gone there were taking their own sweet times. Situation became serious. He remembered the old maxim that 'one can hold a battalion but not his bottom'. He looked forward. Loo was engaged but that one in the First Class section was beckoning him with a bright green smile. He got up and hurried First Class-wards. But then he encountered an obstruction. An obstruction literally and in figuratively. One of the lady cabin crew was blocking the way. He could not pass to the other side. There was not much time for explanations and all. The matter was of utmost importance. He elbowed the lady ran towards the loo and closed the door. And he got good relief.
The relief he got for his physical pain was obliterated when he came out. The lady whom he had elbowed was there to accost him with a complaint of battery and assault which she promptly filed the moment she landed.
The rest of the story is not known as TOI or NYT did not report the concluding part.
